Chick-fil-A piece proves Mark Steyn a future steynborg sent to save us

This is a picture taken in front of the White House by an anonymous patriot, which proves beyond a shadow of a doubt that Mark Steyn is a time-traveling steynborg genius sent to save us all. Notice how space and time warp around him as he shields Chick-fil-A cows from the idiocy of men like Chicago Mayor Rahm Emmanuel.

I’ve wondered for quite some time if Mark Steyn was a secret agent or a Mega Man from the future sent to save us all. Who would have thought that the selective outrage of liberal politicians over chicken sandwiches would have proved once and for all that Mark Steyn is a time-traveling steynborg of conservative awesomeness.

As usual, the steynborg gets to the heart of the matter.

[M]ayor Tom Menino announced that Chick-fil-A would not be opening in his burg anytime soon. “If they need licenses in the city, it will be very difficult,” said His Honor. If you’ve just wandered in in the middle of the column, this guy Menino isn’t the mayor of Soviet Novosibirsk or Kampong Cham under the Khmer Rouge, but of Boston, Massachusetts. Nevertheless, he shares the commissars’ view that in order to operate even a modest and politically inconsequential business it is necessary to demonstrate that one is in full ideological compliance with party orthodoxy. …

As the Boston Herald’s Michael Graham pointed out, Menino is happy to hand out municipal licenses to groups whose most prominent figures call for gays to be put to death. The mayor couldn’t have been more accommodating (including giving them $1.8 million of municipal land) of the new mosque of the Islamic Society of Boston, whose IRS returns listed as one of their seven trustees Yusuf al-Qaradawi. Like President Obama, Imam Qaradawi’s position on gays is in a state of “evolution”: He can’t decide whether to burn them or toss ’em off a cliff. “Some say we should throw them from a high place,” he told Al Jazeera. “Some say we should burn them, and so on. There is disagreement. . . . The important thing is to treat this act as a crime.”

In one fell swoop, Steyn points out the cowardice and danger of these idiots, who target their rage — and power — based on political calculations rather than engaging in open and honest debate. Let’s talk about marriage. Let’s talk about Christianity. Let’s talk about Islam. But don’t threaten to shut down certain groups or sit silent with others because of petty politics.

Can you imagine the outrage if the president of Dominos Pizza made a remark about abortion that upset elected officials in Texas or Oklahoma or Nebraska — so much so that that they channeled Rahm Emmanuel and said, “Dominos values aren’t Austin values” before threatening to turn their lives into zoning-law hell?

When Ben and Jerry’s came out in favor of the “Occupy” movement (and by extension their bowel movements on cop cars) you didn’t see conservatives organize national boycotts. That’s mainly because they have jobs … but also because they’d rather have it out in the court of public opinion. Ben and Jerry are allowed to say things that I believe are stupid, and if I’m angry enough I simply won’t buy their product.

Likewise, Morgan Freeman likes to call guys like me a “racist,” but I still saw The Dark Knight Rises because Christopher Nolan’s talent supersedes Morgan’s ignorance. See how that works, liberals? The free market is a beautiful thing, and much more appealing than threats and intimidation by public officials who try and squelch free speech at every opportunity.

Mark, next time you go to the future, take me with you. My own spaceship broke down, and I’m yearning to return to the time and place when liberals outlaw self defense sporks, if only for a laugh.