Sharpton’s Politics Nation: Where you’re a racist, but Tawana Brawley isn’t mentioned 3

I’m Al Sharpton, and this is Politics Nation, where no one will ever mention the time I ruined a man’s career by accusing him of raping a black woman and smearing feces on her face when, in reality, it was all just a hoax.

If you ever wondered where the lost and confused Obama voters from Howard Stern’s instant-classic election interview go on the rare occasions they need news, look no further than Al Sharpton’s Politics Nation. If you haven’t seen it, check it out. Then, the next time you’re upset at your mom or dad, son or daughter and think, “How could they be so stupid?” think back to Sharpton’s show and you’ll remember just how much you have to be thankful for.

Take, for instance, the Rev’s interview with Joe Madison, of Mornings with Madison. Sharpton asks why Newt Gingrich would call President Obama a “false president,” as if those bastions of conservatism,  CNN and NBC, weren’t mocking Mr. Obama for sitting down on quaint couches with the ladies of The View while Secretary of State Hillary Clinton was at the big boys’ table. Instead of attributing Newt’s criticism of Obama to the Las Vegas fundraisers the day after an American diplomat was murdered overseas and al Qaeda flags were going up at embassies across the Mideast, Mr. Madison sees — wait for it — racism! But not just any racism — we’re talking about “coded-outright racism.”

For the younger generation, when you hear ‘lazy,’ you know that’s the kind of code word they would say about African Americans in the 60’s and 50’s and the decades before. This is more than outright racism. … This generation isn’t falling for it. … [Republicans are] the neanderthals. They’re the ones whose children are sitting there looking at them and wondering, “What cave did you come from?””

Republicans speak in “code,” but it’s also “outright.” No one can hear it, except that everyone hears it. So, in essence, they’re not speaking in code, but they’re really cavemen. And it’s so bad that their kids silently loath them. Bravo, Joe. Bravo. Or should I call you Dr. Watson?

Here’s some more code for you, Joe: You’re an idiot. Oh, wait … that wasn’t code. I really just mean that you’re an idiot.

Remember when Al Sharpton accused cops and a prosecutor of raping Tawana Brawley before smearing feces on her, but it turned out to be a hoax? Remember when Al was successfully sued for slander? I do. Remember when it could be argued that Al Sharpton really did speak in “code,” when he referred to “diamond merchants” after a 1991 tragedy — and then things got out of hand (and by out of hand I mean a man was murdered)? I remember that.

A Hasidic Jewish driver in Brooklyn’s Crown Heights section accidentally kills Gavin Cato, a 7-year-old black child, and antisemitic riots erupt. Sharpton races to pour gasoline on the fire. At Gavin’s funeral he rails against the “diamond merchants” — code for Jews — with “the blood of innocent babies” on their hands. He mobilizes hundreds of demonstrators to march through the Jewish neighborhood, chanting, “No justice, no peace.” A rabbinical student, Yankel Rosenbaum, is surrounded by a mob shouting “Kill the Jews!” and stabbed to death.

As Ned Flanders would say: “Whoopsie-Doodle.”

Is it “coded-outright racism” when I ask why President Obama has time to schedule in a meeting with “The Pimp with the Limp,” but not the Prime Minister of Israel? Is it racist if I wonder why President Obama  can make time for David “I cheat on my wife in adultery dens above the CBS studios” Letterman, but not the guys who want to give him a morning intelligence briefing — in person? Is it racist to wonder why President Obama was able to make a fundraiser with Jay-Z and Beyonce happen, but he couldn’t hammer out a Status of Forces Agreement with Iraq? (Meanwhile, Syria spins out of control, and Iraq turns to Iran to fill their security needs in the absence of U.S. troops.)

Is the New York Times racist because, for all intents and purposes, they’ve exposed the guy who won a Nobel Peace Prize for, umm, not being George W. Bush, as the one who sat back and “led from behind” as the Mideast melted down?

The civil war in Syria is testing Iraq’s fragile society and fledgling democracy, worsening sectarian tensions, pushing Iraq closer to Iran and highlighting security shortcomings just nine months after American forces ended their long and costly occupation here.

There are so many substantive issues that critics of the President are talking about, but MSNBC hosts and their guests do the equivalent of sticking their fingers in their ears while screaming racism because in any honest debate President Obama comes out battered and bloodied. (Is that “code” too, Joe?) Every question on MSNBC is some variation of the question, “How dumb is Mitt Romney?” and the answer is always, “Really dumb.” And then everyone chortles like Martin Bashir and the cycle starts all over again.

Newsflash: I can give you 16 trillion reasons not to vote for the president, and not one of them pertains to the color of his skin.

Good luck with the “coded-outright racism” pitch, Joe. It sounds like a real winner. I’m sure the Rev will give you a lot more chances to trot it out between now and election day. Just don’t get on his bad side; he might accuse you of wiping feces on a teenager.

“Did I just say that Republicans speak in “code” while being “outright” racists? Perhaps I meant to say that they are “subconsciously-consciously” racist? I’m so confused … and yet now I’m wondering: If a Republican calls me “confused,” what is THAT code for? I need to get race off my mind. I really do.”

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3 comments

  1. You call yourself a rev. Why do you believe in killing babies? Has anyone ever described hell to you? You are a scumbag Al!

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